Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Delaying Gratification - a sign of maturity?

I have been wanting to write about this but procrastination keeps getting the better of me up till now that I'm confined to a hospital bed after minor surgery on my toe.

Some weeks ago, Joseph brought home another catalog of books by Scholastic, from school. The books are heavily discounted, sometimes up to 90% off regular retail prices. Usually we allow him to pick 1 or 2 titles but this time round, I didn't find anything interesting enough worth buying. He however pointed out some book that he thought otherwise.

Daalin too wasn't too keen on making the purchase but we didn't want to seem stingy. So I sat him down and had a good chat with him. I asked him if he would consider skipping this round and save the money for our trip to Singapore in December. I also explained that if we skip the small stuff and save up, he can enjoy the dinosaur show which he so very much wants to see. He listened attentively and then gladly agreed with me.

Today I managed to catch up on my reading....

And I felt greatly encouraged to read that...

"...delaying gratification is a sign of maturity. On that principle, we live in an increasingly immature society. Teaching the value of waiting and the importance of self-control (hard though it may be) is a part of parental training."

My suggestion to save up must have stuck deep within him because last week, I suggested that I would get him another Magic School Bus VCD if he could get 6/6 for his ejaan.

Immediately he told me, "It's ok, I don't need anymore reward. We can save up the money for the dinosaur show".

That sure made me want to get him an even bigger reward. Either he honestly wants to help save my money, or he doesn't think he can get 6/6 for his ejaan, or he just knows how to play reverse psychology with me.

Long story short....

1. He scored 4/6 for his ejaan last week. I know he tried really hard and I made sure I assured him it was alright.

2. I bought him a Magic School Bus movie (can't find the correct pic online) anyway. When we gave it to him, he looked quite surprised. But we told him that it was simply because we love him. (And isn't that how it is with our Heavenly Father who delights in pouring out his abundant richest blessings upon us.)

He loves this latest episode about photosynthesis. I love it too. It's really educational. And it is so timely because he has been learning (and growing) about plants in school. He also brought home some taugeh growing in a cup that he planted in school.

I'm so proud of you, Joseph!


  1. yes definitely

    joe is very matured

    we r doing nicky & sila lee's marriage course - highly recommended - will definitely be reading their parenting book.

  2. and I am very proud of you, a wonderful mother/teacher, who can also write and express thoughts and ideas amazingly well.

  3. i am impressed!! i wonder if my kids could be like this, knowing that the mother's (hem hem) self control level is pretty low when come to getting desired stuffs.

  4. Jo is such a good boy. I always read with admiration on how mature and thoughtful he is.