The difference with no.3...

First kid - I washed his bum in warm water and dried with his own towel at each diaper change.
Third kid - a wet wipe will suffice and cold water is okay.

First kid - I used Bepanthen.
Third kid - Vaseline is much cheaper.

First kid - I jump each time he even whimpers a little... Is he hungry? Dirty? Colic?
Third kid - a little crying is good for your lungs.

First kid - I check the time at each feed, each nap and count how many times he poops each day.
Third kid - I don't even look at the clock.

First kid - I sterilized his bottles.
Third kid - I don't have a sterilizer. Rinsing with hot water will do.

On the plus side...

With Joseph, I worried he would get used to my rocking him to sleep and his sleeping on my chest would tie me down. My worries caused much unnecessary stress on myself. I rocked him till one day when he was 13 months old - he just pushed me away, crawled into his crib and fell asleep. I felt so redundant! Now, in the blink of an eye, he's coming to 7 years old, over 24 kg and impossible for me to carry.

I've learnt my lesson. With Isabel, I'm more relaxed. She can nurse as long as she wants. The last few days, she has been napping for about 3 hours each afternoon on my chest. She sleeps so much more soundly and I get some sleep too. I know for sure this will not be forever and I will miss it all too soon.

One month old - Non-fat milk or not enough milk

Isabel is one month old...tomorrow! She's grown. Not as much as I hoped and wish but she's grown.

I estimate she's just 3.6kg at one month old (3.025kg at birth). Her head circumferance has increased from 33cm to 36cm. Length-wise, she's 55cm compared to 48.5cm at birth.

And she did all this growing on MY milk!!! But she ain't chubby... unlike some breastfed babies I know. Like her older siblings, she's lean. They all are when breastfed...like kampung chickens. My mum says I produce non-fat milk. That's why breastfeeding is such an emotional struggle for me.

Did I mention I have this love-hate feeling with breastfeeding?

I love how baby cuddles up to me. I guess it's God's way of making mummies hold their babies more so that baby gets the hugs and cuddles they need to thrive. It's good bonding time!

But if you know my babies, they take a really really long time to feed!!! They feed and then they fall asleep so I keep my boob. But once they realize their mouth is empty, they want the breast again.

They don't sleep for long periods either. At least not on their own. They can sleep 3hours in my arms but awake the moment I put them down.

They also want to be carried all the time. I realize now that this is normal for all babies. They love the warmth and coziness of being cuddled.

When they do sleep, I wonder if ...
A. they sleep because there's no milk to drink or
B. they sleep because they are actually full.

And when they take so long to feed, is it because...
A. they are waiting for the 'let down' for milk to flow or
B. they just like having the nipple iin their mouth

Consequently, baby is either stuck to my breast or in my arms at least 20 hours a day! Nah..I don't think I'm exaggerating.

I feel so trapped.

I eat in a hurry, poo in a hurry, shower in a hurry. I don't even have time to look in the mirror because baby will be crying and looking for my breast!

Thus far, the older kids have been great. They understand that I can't do as much with them for now. Joy in particular is still trying to adjust. She loves her baby sister but when it comes to bedtime, she wants mummy all to herself. She wants me to lie down with her and hug her till she falls asleep, which is what she's used to before Isabel arrived.

In spite of all the above, I'm thankful. This 'hardship' will pass. Soon. Though time seems to crawl by for now.

I'm thankful for perfectly healthy babies.

A different kind of confinement

This is by far my most 'liberal' confinement.

It's been 2.5 weeks and thus far, I've gone out 3 times - twice to the paediatrician's clinic and of course to Joseph's graduation.

The first time round in 2005, I just sat in an air-conditioned room, ate, fed and slept. I slept when baby slept. Joe puked after every feed so I was always changing him and myself and we had tonnes of laundry. My MIL cooked while my mum helped with baby - changing, washing, rocking etc. I had difficulty getting up, couldn't cough, couldn't laugh and very sore nipples. I also don't know who on earth said women in confinement had to wear sarong! I felt absolutely fat, flabby and so totally like a "Ah Soh".

My second confinement was actually in 2007 after my D&C. We lost the baby at 9 weeks - I had bleeding, there was no heartbeat and baby was small for date. We stayed in KL and I was 'confined' for only 2 weeks.

The third time round in 2008, I still had my MIL to cook and my mom to help with baby while Daalin and Ah Kong entertained Joe (aged 2 yrs 9 months then) with trips to the park and playgrounds. I got smarter and wore long pants instead of sarong. While I didn't suffer from sore nipples, I did have a episiotomy wound that hurt for 2 weeks - sitting and moving was agonizing!

This time round is by far the least painful confinement. I had some discomfort sitting for about only 3 days. Thereafter, I've more or less gone about the usual daily stuff including bathing the older kids, cleaning the house, changing the bedsheets and folding the laundry. My mum does the cooking while I see to all baby's needs except her daily bath which Nana sees to.

I feel a lot more normal. I don't know where the sarongs are. And I am amazed at how I'm surviving with so little sleep.

p/s : If you're wondering how I have the time to blog, it's because I've learnt to do a lot with just one hand. So I can breastfeed while making milk for the older kids, or getting their breakfast or folding laundry or eating or typing like what I'm doing right now.

Life with Isabel

It's been two weeks since Isabel arrived. Yes, that's the name Joy picked for her baby sister.Joy absolutely adores her sister, always wanting to hug and kiss baby Isabel. Isabel - she's relatively easier than Joe and Joy were at this stage. I say relatively. That means it's not entirely easy. But at least she doesn't keep throwing up like Joe did.

The first two nights after I got home from the hospital was tough. One night I fed her non-stop from midnight till 5am! That was on top of 3 rounds of formula (30ml each time)!

Thereafter things got better. Some nights she sleeps for at least a 4-hour stretch. It's also relatively easy because I don't have a c-section or an episiotomy wound to deal with. Having breastfed before, I also don't have to deal with sore nipples and I know how to deal with engorgement.

I used to say that I wish I could fast forward the first 6 months. Now I'm starting to enjoy every moment. After all, they do grow way too fast!

Two, Three or More – No.3 is here!

5th November 2011 – one day to due date : I woke up at about 6am feeling a little crampy with a stuffy nose. Maybe it’s hunger pangs. Popped half a polaramine, drank some water and tried to go back to sleep. A short while later, I got up again and felt some mucus oozing out but no blood. I still wasn’t sure if this was for real.

7.00am – the blood-tinged mucus plug showed itself. I showered and washed my hair but did not tell Daalin, who was going out for his Men’s Group Breakfast Meeting, knowing that if I told him, he would not go.

Thereafter, I had irregular contractions, about 20 minutes apart. I took my time to do devotion with Joseph and then Joy woke up and I gave them both breakfast before Daalin came back and we left home at about 10.15am for the hospital.

10.30am – Arrived at Assunta hospital, strolled from the multi-storey parking to reception and walked up the stairs to the delivery suite. I still wasn’t really in pain. The midwife did an internal examination – I was just 3cm dialted. After browsing the newspaper I started to get kinda bored. Contractions were about 10 minutes apart – some a wee bit more painful but still very bearable.

2.00pm – I was getting really bored and started to wonder if this was going to take all day. Meanwhile, Daalin entertained himself on the ipad.

3.15pm – The midwife checked me again – 6cm dilated. I thought it was going to take a long while more. Contractions were still irregular at between 3-6 minutes apart, some stronger some not at all.

After that internal examination, things happened really fast. I suddenly had very strong contractions with the urge to push. At each contraction, I asked Daalin the time – 3.28pm, 3.30pm, 3.32pm… and the next contraction broke the water bag as I felt a gush of fluid. Daalin pushed the bell button to call for the nurse.

Dr arrived just in time to put on his gear and catch baby, born at 3.45pm.
I’m so thankful to God for answering my prayers for a natural birth. No Pitocin drip, no epidural, no pethidine jab and not even the gas! I didn’t have an episiotomy either. But dr did stitch up a small tear which he said was less than half an inch long. I guess this is as drug-free as it gets. I’m also not on any painkillers, most of which I’m allergic to.

Even though the entire labour was almost 10 hours long if you count from the first ‘pain’, I was really in pain for only the last 30minutes.

And now the fun and adventure begins….by God’s grace and strength!

Two, Three or more - almost ready!

It's two weeks to due date and I think I'm quite ready.

Still, I don't think baby will arrive much earlier if any earlier. From past experiences, neither babies wanted to come out. They were so comfy in there we had to evict them by force.

I was pregnant for a full 41 weeks with Joseph. Seven days past due date and there was still no dilation no contractions. His movements were also not satisfactory and so they wheeled me straight into the OT. Joe came out blue with the umbilical cord firmly around his neck three times!

Because of this, I was not allowed to go past due date with Joy. My gynae gave me up to 2 days before due date. Thank God I had a show just the day before I walked in to hospital to be induced. Dr Kalavathi of Seremban Specialist Hospital was most helpful in helping me deliver Joy naturally. No epidural! Hospital bill was less than RM2000 and I walked out of hospital with my princess barely 24 hours after she was born.

This time round, I'm hoping to do without an episiotomy. Then I can be jumping around the next day!

Two, three or more - approaching D-date!

I realize that it's been a long time since I updated about our two, three or more plan. Well at the moment, it's no longer just two. No.3 is almost arriving!

I'm just past the 36 weeks mark and the due date is fast approaching. The kids are excited to meet their new sister. Yes, the gynae has confirmed baby is a girl (and I saw for myself) although I've been bumping into this old aunty in the church toilet for 2 consecutive Sundays now who keeps insisting that I'm carrying a boy.

I've put on about 12kg to date and everything seems to be right in front. Tummy is pretty low with plenty of pelvic pressure making it impossible for me to get through the night without getting up to pee.

The hospital bag is more or less packed and baby's clothes are ready in the drawer. Got my hair cut, and done most of the necessary shopping. Now I wonder if I can just leave my pink nail polish on my toes when I go in for delivery....